teammates

where does it start and where does it end.

i mean i have this homegirl that keeps making bad decisions and creates and fabricates things in her head to make them bigger and more drama than they need to be.

she met a guy got his number.. they go to the same school kinda have the same circle of friends.. they cruised one time maybe two. she found out that he tried to get at her teammate but her teammate told the dude she got a man. my homegirl flipped out.. not at her teammate but at the guy. she went on ranting about how she hates guys and they are all the same! ..

she claims she hates and doesn't trust guys. BUT yet she wants a man!
1. if u want a guy you cannot hate him off the bat
2. NO dude is gonna be with you if you don't trust them
3. guy's hate it when you compare them to the rest .. true they might all act the same but they are not the same person, therefore they can all change and react differently.

you gotta want to be in a relationship, and have to want to be with that person && not do it because it's convenient for both parties. i say this because i love her as a friend and i want to see her happy ..she was trippin that he tried o get at her roommate but news FLASH everyone tires to get at everyone's room/team mate at one time or another... i have dated guys on the same team.. they didn't trip... and she is trippin that he spit game at her teammate well at least he didn't fuck some of your teammates like others that we know.

if there is noo flag you cannot claim the territory... just because you visit a country does not make it yours and you don't become a local.
just because you kick it with a guy once or twice does not make u his girl, and does not put a status on ur relationship. just like a country.. a relationship take time to develop.

if you want big love you gotta take big risks... she isn't willing to take that risk.. she doesn't want to get hurt again.. we have all been hurt and will get hurt but its the risk we take when we want something amazing like love.

habits

the long anticiated winter break is coming to its end. and over this winter break has become the most intersting and most eventful break of them all. yet more than anything it has beenconnfising for me... making decisions that should be made with confidence and made with out any hesitation...

for theses decisions i made i did make with out hesitation but not enough confidence and now i have been drowning myself with thoughts and reassurance that i have made the right choice and i am making the right decision... since old habits die hard and you never forget your first love

love is the one thing in the wold we all strives for, but after we get a taste of it, nothing is ever the same. why is it we can never break that thing that made us want to live for anything but only die for one. then the crazy notion of being able to love again is a shot in the dark. but is it only a shot in the dark because we cannot let go of the first love and its habits. to let a new love and new habits form.

am i settling for is it a new experience ... is the past the past or am i supposed to make that past my present and future


this winter break i fell for some one new ... but am being dragged and held back by the old

The split personality of "he is soo good for u and the he is just another player"... the daring smile but with the swagger of prince charming...never boring...too clever for his own good wit a possible hidden agenda... u have that material insight ..but that's not what I see with you ...all that extra baggage isn't the problem... the problem is u being so infamous wit that "ima keep it real with you" but yet sounds sooo fake...but I guess only time will tell

i hate the mind games ...

team pictures

my water polo team at ohlone got the proofs to our team pictures and can i say i got a pretty team as far as water polo teams go. my team has girly looking girls in a good way. most teams have big Bertha's and hamburglers.. or girls the size of D1 line backers with the occasional cute girl on the team.. lol.. but my team all around ..pretty

then for the other team picture that is traditionally in our swim suits.. this year we decided to do something a lil different ....

just use your imagination ...lol

i have faith in my paper

so basically .. i had my last formal essay due for English class with the infamous MR.HALLFORD.. haha. And once again i procrastinated till the last min.. but i mean of course i finished it lol.. with some help of my new found friends SEAN and ZAIN..lol.. they helped me with my paper =]

here comes the downfall.. ZAIN tells me my paper is shiitty just because i dont have structure when he could have wrote it wit his eye closed... lol but i don't care because i got to put my own personal views and my thoughts down in i said what needed to be said..but i am kinda wishing i would have asked for their help ..lol

however i have faith in my paper

on the rarest of occasions is it possibly for my family to sit at a table together and not fight. which is probably similar to millions of people around the world. except for when it comes to the holidays. i don't understand why all of a sudden everyone can get along for only certain days out of the year but any other time they are waiting for the chance to slit the others throat. but none the less i was happy to at least have things back to the way they used to be. i just wish i couldn't feel the tension and disagreements rising.